Meliora Weekend fast approaches and Alums will be returning to their beloved college home, and the current group will be faced with the invasion of the very same. For our group, like it or not, this weekend has been the source of some weird tension in the past; never fully acknowledged, never really understood, and therefore never really dealt with.
I was speaking with one of the current members recently about what this could actually be about, from whence it might stem, and how we could strive to understand things better.
Here's what we came up with (an explication, if you will): Every year, a class graduates. In the months leading up to May, the group worries about the holes that will be made by their departure, thinking, "How are we ever going to find someone who can hit that high note? Who will rock out on bass quite like her?" The senior show comes, people cry over champagne and bouquets, and then you realize that you are going to sing it all again 3 weeks later on the day before graduation. Summer feels liberating as you rejoice in your friends from home and not having to go to rehearsal, but as August finally rolls around, you realize you've missed the camaraderie and can't wait to get back to school and to singing! You sit through hours of auditions and get really excited about the newbies, and, while it's different, you realize that maybe this year is actually going to be ok. The semester comes at you fast in a flurry of learning, gigging, and touring. The group bonds, you learn new songs, you fill in old parts, and you move on.
On the other side of things, as a Senior, you dread the approach of May while also welcoming it. You're scared about what you're going to do after you graduate because our society only tells us what to expect up until the end of college. While your mind is preoccupied with that fear, you're also really excited at the same time. You are tired of the group drama and the musical obligations that may get in the way of partying with friends who you might not see again for a while. You also know you're going to miss it terribly and wonder if there are musical groups in the city you're moving to that will remotely compare. You start to think about your journey in the group; how things have changed, what you brought to the dynamic, what they'll be missing when you leave, and what it will be like to visit.
And then comes October.
The combination of different emotions is so ridiculously confusing. At the combined rehearsal, you're excited, nervous, stressed, unsure, and completely overwhelmed. There are new faces, new songs, new sounds, and lots and lots of women in a small, poorly ventilated room. The newly bonded but still slightly fragile current group is faced with the arrival of old members who have not been privy to the inside jokes, the new songs, or the changes that have inevitably come about, but who have a whole slew of their own at the same time. The people who used to be really tight are still friends, but have arrived at a different phase of friendship. There are suddenly 4 directors in the room, trying to figure out a chain of command. There are thirty people talking after the pitch has been played, instead of 3. The current group wonders what the alums will think of their new sound; they want to look good and sound great. The alums are excited to hear the new stuff, but they're also secretly hoping that maybe they'll be able to tell that they've been missed.
The resulting weekend is therefore muddled. It's neat to meet the new ladies you haven't ever met before. It's also overwhelming. It's cool to hear the old and new songs and see for yourself how things have changed. It's also inevitable that the two be compared a little bit.
What I would like to propose for this year and all those in the future is that we try to leave that comparison at just that – comparison – and leave the judgement out of it. We are all very talented women. We have also all been so lucky to be involved with this group, a group that has a rich, far-reaching history of being different from "the other girl groups." Let's prove it by leaving the pettiness at the door, and just get excited about the new and the old at the same time. Let's sing together and be psyched about the extensive history we're continuing and creating, and just have an awesome weekend.
Meliora.
